Sometimes by Step

I'm currently on a long drive back home and put in an old Rich Mullins CD. I had forgotten what a treasure this man's music was. I wanted to share this song's lyrics and declare that I will follow Him all of my days. (And when I get home I'll make sure this post makes sense.)

Sometimes the night was beautiful
Sometimes the sky was so far away
Sometimes it seemed to stoop so close
You could touch it but your heart would break
Sometimes the morning came too soon
Sometimes the day could be so hot
There was so much work left to do
But so much You'd already done

Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
Oh God, You are my God
And I will ever praise You
I will seek You in the morning
And I will learn to walk in Your ways
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days

Sometimes I think of Abraham
How one star he saw had been lit for me
He was a stranger in this land
And I am that, no less than he
And on this road to righteousness
Sometimes the climb can be so steep
I may falter in my steps
But never beyond Your reach

And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
And step by step You'll lead me
And I will follow You all of my days
And I will follow You all of my days
(Sometimes the night was beautiful)
And I will follow You all of my days

Rich Mullins

1991

Sometimes By Step

No Where Else to Run

We went to a memorial service a couple of Saturdays ago for a 37 year old man. He had a heart attack. All you can do is shake your head. I suppose you could shake your fist at God, too, especially if you were his parents, burying their firstborn. Many people have done that.

But not this man's parents. They are sad. Very sad. They will miss him so much. They have stood with him as he has made difficult job choices, needed to move back home, struggled with life, as we all do. They have invested so much into their son. And in the last year, he was moving forward, largely because of their encouragement and help. And now he is gone. Vanished. He will not be coming back home to visit or to live. Just gone.

That's how death is. You love them and then they are gone. To our minds that seems so unfair. Like "what is God thinkin'?" But death is a part of living here on earth as human beings. Or even as animals, our pets. Death has, or will, touch each one of us.

And it is a truth, not trivial truth, but real truth, that we do not have to grieve as those who have not hope (I Thessalonians 4:13), if we choose not to. When someone dies, if we know they had their hope in Jesus Christ, we know they are with Him. Even if we aren't better off without them. And we know we will see them again, if we have our hope in Jesus, too.

Life is good. Life is sometimes hard. Loss of a loved one is one of the hardest things. It's strange. It's unbearable sometimes. But that's when a person just has to cling to Jesus and all that He said about trusting Him. Where else would ya go? Grief can be easier where there is hope in Jesus.

Our 37 year old friend probably wasn't expecting his pending death. But if he had been, I think he would have had a sense of fear of the unknown, but also excitement at being in the arms of Jesus.

To Be WITH His People

I have long struggled with the notion that God loves ME. I know He does - in my head. But in my heart it seems like a distant concept. And that goes along with the interpersonal struggles I've had of feeling unlove-able and unlove-ing. And the way that translates into my relationship with my God and Savior, is a problem.

That's why the obvious theme throughout the Bible is so comforting - so loving. God says over and over - and over that He wants to be the God of His people. And to be WITH them. That theme is woven into the very heart of the Bible. He often spoke about the day when "He would be their God and they would be His people." I think that is all He has ever wanted.

It must be something like this: when I talk about my relatives in the hills of eastern Tennessee, I often refer to them as "my people." I feel a bit of pride when I say that and think of the manners of speech, the old ways that I remember from my childhood - of  the faces that make up my family. My people were resourceful, independent, strong.

That must be akin to how God feels about "His people." In the Old Testament alone I have a list of at least eleven times when he told Moses to tell the people or Jeremiah, Ezekiel or Zechariah to tell the people those very words. (And I've probably missed some.) Often times it was in a warning because they had turned their backs on Him. Still, He longed to dwell among His people, walk among them - to be their God and for them to be His people in their hearts (Levititcus 26:11-12). In Jeremiah 3:19-20, He said it this way as He grieved their rebellious hearts:
   
     "How gladly would I treat you like sons [and daughters]
     and give you a desirable land, the most beautiful
     inheritance of any nation. I thought you would call me
     'Father' and not turn away from following me. But like
     a woman unfaithful to her husband, so you have been
     unfaithful to me O house of Israel." NIV

You can hear the pain in His tender words. In Ezekiel 34:31 He says,

     "'And you, my sheep, the sheep of my pasture, are MY people, and
     I am your God,' declares the sovereign Lord." NET

But, as we know, Israel would fall into idolatry and rebellion over and over again. Still He longed to be their God. So He sent Jesus the Christ to atone for their sins and to make a way for them to be, at last, His people in their heart. And, as is so clear in the Bible, this plan for redeeming His people to Himself was extended to all people of every nation and ethnicity - any who would come to God by faith in Jesus' sacrifice. Jesus made that clear in John 10, where He says many times in that chapter that He is the Good Shepherd and that He knows his sheep and his sheep knows Him. In verse 16, He says,  

     "I have other sheep that are not of this sheep pen. I must bring them also.
     They too will listen to my voice, and there shall be one flock and one shepherd."

And don't we take comfort in John 14 where Jesus says that He is going to His Father's house to prepare a place for us and that He will come back to get us so that "you also may be where I am." He prayed in John 17:24 that He wants those who God has given Him to be where He is and to see His glory."  It is and always has been the heart of God and of His Son, to be the God of His people and to dwell among them.

And finally it will happen, just as He wants. In Revelation 21, John was seeing the vision of the new heaven and the new earth and he says, "I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, 'Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God." That is all God has ever wanted!

God loves His people, so much that He sent Jesus to buy them back. And I am included in His people by faith in my Redeemer. I am loved. He desires to be with me. And with you.

Oh, happy day! Happy forever!



(For reference, if you want to look up verses, the list I mentioned is:
Exodus 6:7, Leviticus 26:11-12, Jeremiah 7:23, 11:4, 24:7, 30:22, 32:33, 32:38, Ezekiel 34:30-31, 36:28, 37:26-27, Zechariah 13:9, John 14:2-3, 17:24, II Corinthians 6:16 and finally Revelation 21:3-4)

The Gift of Joy

I'm drinking my coffee this morning out of a large mug given to me by Mom for Christmas. It is lovely, with a baby cardinal on it and a snow scene. Don't ask why there's a baby bird during the winter! That's not the point. The saying on it is, "The smallest wonders often bring the greatest JOYS."

That got me thinking about the joy that comes from the Lord. We know that joy is part of the fruit of the Spirit, which means it comes from God, the Spirit. One of the definitions of joy on dictionary.com is, "source or cause of keen pleasure or delight; something or someone greatly valued or appreciated..."

I wanted the definitions to include something about a deep down happiness that is much more than happiness. I wanted it to say that happiness is caused by externals, like getting a new sofa, a new job, a new home. Or an ice cream cone. But that joy is deep down inside, even when we aren't exceptionally happy or maybe even down right sad. Because, that's what joy means to me. That's how it was for me, even when my first husband of 28 years died.

That kind of deep down joy is a gift we are given as we walk this journey of faith. "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." Jesus said that in John 16:33 but he prefaced it with, "I have told you these things (the things just prior to this verse), so that you may have peace (insert joy) IN ME. In this world you will have trouble..."

That makes me sigh and take a deep breath. It makes me joyful deep down in my being. I don't want to have trouble. Or suffering (NET version) but when I do - because I'm in the world - He wants me to have peace IN HIM because He has overcome the world. And He wants that for you, too.

In Habakkuk, the prophet was writing about a harsh judgement that was coming on Israel and he thought it wasn't fair. He had a debate with God and guess who wins. After God speaks, Habakkuk decides to trust in the Lord. He ends in Chapter 3 with:

"...I will rejoice in the LORD, I will be joyful in God my Savior. The Sovereign LORD is my strength..."  Hab. 3:18 NIV

The text note of my Kindle NET Bible says of this passage, "Difficult times are coming, but Habakkuk is confident the LORD will sustain him. Habakkuk will be able to survive..."

I love that joy, the joy that comes from trust in the Lord. I don't always trust Him and lean on Him completely. And it's those times that I fear and worry - and don't have joy.  But when I can move back toward the Lord, knowing full well that troubles will come, and still take courage because He has overcome the world, that deep-down sense of well-being, peace, yes, joy, returns. I want to abide in that joy. I want to trust Him more!

An Anoles Point-of-View

This post was originally posted on Spinning Memories, Knitting Love, and has be replaced here.

Uploaded image from http://wallpaper.searchrealm.com/

Anoles aren't very smart. At least in our eyes. When my boys were home and our nephew lived with us, we had 3 anoles, one for each boy. These cute little green lizards were brown sometimes. They lived in an aquarium with stones on the bottom, a long stick inside and a rock or two to hide under and behind. That was their world.  

I, more often than not, fed and watered them, mainly because I took pleasure in looking after them. Sometimes when the house was empty and quiet, I would sit near the cage and watch them interact with one another or climb around their stick or just close their eyes to rest. It was fun to watch these little creatures. I would buy or catch bugs for them to eat, dropping them down into their enclosure. And I would "make rain on them" by spritzing water into their realm so they could drink the droplets. I even hooked up a lamp nearby to give them "sunlight" and warmth. It was usually on for them during the day, especially dreary days.

But with all that I did for them, they didn't realize that this great big giant creature that comes around cares for their well-being. They didn't recognize my help and they usually ran and hide from me. When I would raise the lid to drop bugs in, they would run from my hands.

My hands had never done anything to cause them not to trust me. But the act of my hands giving them food or giving them water made them run and hide.  They only partook after I was gone - they did not see my hands connected with the provision. And they did not realize that the warm lamp light that they enjoyed so much, even that was provided by my hand. Such a small view they had!

We are much like that.  We have a "great big" creator who takes pleasure in us and who delights in providing all that we need for life and holiness (II Peter 1:3).  But we don't always see His provision and we run in the opposite direction - anywhere we can go to be "free" to make our own way, we think. We are independent and are so often afraid to trust the the One who provides for us. We prefer to trust ourselves.  I am guilty, too.

Now, one of the these anoles, the smallest one seemed to become accustomed to my help. Sometimes, just sometimes, when I would squirt him with a water mist, instead of flinching or running, he would stick out his tongue and drink off the glass as I squirted.  It was delightful and I felt that, in some small way, he had learned to trust that what I was doing was for his good.  

But one day he managed to escape his safe enclosure. He "left my care." He got free to a world in which he had no idea how to survive. No idea of the pain he was causing himself. It was winter so there were no bugs for him to catch and eat.  No water anywhere that he could get to.  I could do NOTHING for him.  His choice to run from my care changed his life forever.  

One day a few weeks later I was standing near a winter sun beam on the floor and here came my little friend.  He was being drawn to the warmth of the sun.  He had lost a lot of weight and maybe because of the accompanying weakness, he let me pick him up and put him back where I could care for him once again. And let me tell you, he drank and drank and drank.

It soon became clear that even though he had come back to a place of letting me care for him, his "choice" weakened him and he was never as strong again.  We fed him and he gained some weight and some strength.  But he was never as good as before. Not too long after that, he shriveled up and died.

Oh, that we, that you and I would choose always to stay in that place of child-like faith where God can tend to all our needs, physical, emotional, spiritual - all of them.  That place of faith where we leave Him the freest to look after us.  We make choices all the time, every day, that either keeps us in there or takes us from it, step-by-step.

Image from http://wallpaper.searchrealm.com/  

I'm not so afraid to trust Him, but I forget to trust Him. In the cares and duties of life I forget to look to Him, to lean on Him for my guidance, my strength and my help. I act like I can figure things out better than He can.  But, like the little anole that I thought was so dumb, I see my little world through my little perspective.  I walk away from the one Source of life itself. He sees the entire picture and His ways are so much higher than mine. Sometimes, my skull is just so thick.

But I am very thankful that He is patient and loving and has never turned His back on me. I am thankful for the fact that He takes us back, meets us where we are and can give us second chances, if we let him.